Twas the Night Before Christmas

...and I had a wax and bought pricey but effective skin creams with nearly the very last of my money. Then I ran into two homeless people who have become somewhat friends.

Back in August when I was the proud possessor of a Gold Double Pass to an Independent Cinema, a homeless man approached me after I'd just walked out from a film with the BOI. He was after spare change or donations; begging by any other name. I asked him whether he'd like cinema tickets instead, he was delighted and so I walked straight back to the box office and 'purchased' two tickets to the film of his choice: "Mongol". He was very sweet and wanted to confirm that I didn't have to pay for the tickets, as what he really needed was to scratch together $48 to stay in a rooming house that night. I said it was ok and that I didn't have to pay for the tickets. He requested a seat in the middle of the theatre, ostensibly he hadn't been to the cinema in many years. When the tickets were in his hands he bounded off to the back of Borders bookstore - I wondered whether he had a friend to give the second ticket to or whether he was to entrepreneurially on-sell them. That was a Wednesday night. I felt pleased that i'd finally used my Gold Cinema pass powers for good, I'd wanted to do it for ages as many people beg around that cinema's foyer.

A few days later, 8-10km south of the cinema on the other side of town, I ran into this poor sweet man again. He was sitting on the pavement and looking up at passers by, asking for spare change. I said to him "do you remember me? I gave you the cinema tickets the other night". He was extremely gracious and thankful and said that his girlfriend made him change the tickets to see "Sex and The City". The film wasn't his cup of tea but it was still terrific to go to the cinema. Apparently the box office staff were "really good about swapping the tickets". I was rapt by having bumped into him and said I had the cinema pass so I would do it again if we saw each other near the cinema.

Some months later I ran into him outside the cinema again - this time we introduced ourselves formally; his name is Jack. He didn't feel like going to the cinema that time, though I was trying to max-out the pass' potential and give him more tickets. He explained how he was trying to save up for a bond as the rooming house was overpriced and not an ideal way to live.

Tonight on Christmas eve Jack was sitting outside Dan Murphy's, on the pavement, asking folks for money. I was on the mobile phone when I passed him and he didn't see me anyway. I was asking a friend what kind of alcohol and gourmet nibbles I should take to Christmas lunch. Happily, when I left the supermarket (economic rationalism kicked in and I bought mango juice instead of grog), Jack was still in the same posi, and his girlfriend was now sitting next to him. He recognised my face but I had to clarify our acquaintance, his girlfriend was delighted to meet me, as I was her and she re-told how they swapped the tickets for "Sex and The City". Her name is Jessica and she was charming, albeit smoking a cigarette (some people wear it well).

Once again they were piecing together $48. I was able to contribute $4 only (shouldn't have got that wax.... yes I should have). The rooming house is near where I live. $48 a night or $170 for the week. They explained it was a tiny room with a mattress on the floor and complimentary cockroaches. Jack and Jessica have the promise of a housing commission flat to move into within a few weeks, right near the cinema. I really hope it works out for them. They are lovely people and I want to get to know them better.

Having such encounters quells my preoccupation with men and self-interests. The VTL (very tall lawyer) stayed last night. He thrillingly pursued a dinner-date with me only days after our Friday night fling. I haven't heard from him today and already the anxiety is rising. What if I've been rejected? What do I feel about him anyway? I was much more attracted to him than I expected. Celibacy is perhaps a safer place to live, now that I've broken the love-making drought, I just want more, it's like an alcoholic accidentally taking brandy butter with the pudding. Christmas day is in the way, he's going to his folks place, I'm off on a mini road trip, taking with me my lust and curiosity for this new and rather interesting man. A problem is that I don't entirely trust myself. Alot of men would probably charm me right now and I'd kiss the majority of them. Why do I want the future to reveal itself so urgently? When I get there I'm sure I will have wanted to make the most of every moment and relive whatever ones were the best; sunbake on the island of time. So for now, on the night before Christmas, I shall not fret about whether he will call or not. I shall revel in my horizontality and enjoy the first Christmas eve night I've ever spent alone. I'm happy about it. Merry Christmas.