BG's disappeared. Never responded to my last correspondence. Still interstate presumably. What to do? Hang tight I guess. I'm feeling fine. Disappointed I guess. But I just did some mending (sewed button back on jacket and fixed bag that broke nearly 2 years ago) so I must be of stable state of mind. I'm optimistic but have a sense that I shouldn't reach out any further to BG right in this moment. At some point I'd like to show him that I care and like him just the way he is, but I'm mindful of freaking him out and I'm doing fine on my own. I made a dubious-looking vegetable soup tonight.
Where does my current lightness of mind come from? It's unexplainable. I'm not doing any exercise and that's dreadful; ask my gluteal muscles. Where does my lack of fear and optimism come from? It's unexplainable; bordering on delusional?
This morning I had a rough start. Slept in til 930am when I'd promised to be at office earlier. Felt a little guilty and annoyed at myself but as I dashed out the door I found a taxi right outside my house, so said to myself "It's my lucky day!". I then repeated the sentiment to myself several more times today. I'd better head to bed soon or there'll be another repeat of this morning and my bank account can't afford cabs every day. Money is still a problem. I pondered today whilst I was in the taxi whether I'll live to the very edge of my means even when my income increases? I plan not to but I love being free with money.
I've really got to close now. I kind of made some weak promise to myself that I'd do the dishes before bed and I can sense I'm going to break that right now.... but I won't hate myself!
Where does my current lightness of mind come from? It's unexplainable. I'm not doing any exercise and that's dreadful; ask my gluteal muscles. Where does my lack of fear and optimism come from? It's unexplainable; bordering on delusional?
This morning I had a rough start. Slept in til 930am when I'd promised to be at office earlier. Felt a little guilty and annoyed at myself but as I dashed out the door I found a taxi right outside my house, so said to myself "It's my lucky day!". I then repeated the sentiment to myself several more times today. I'd better head to bed soon or there'll be another repeat of this morning and my bank account can't afford cabs every day. Money is still a problem. I pondered today whilst I was in the taxi whether I'll live to the very edge of my means even when my income increases? I plan not to but I love being free with money.
I've really got to close now. I kind of made some weak promise to myself that I'd do the dishes before bed and I can sense I'm going to break that right now.... but I won't hate myself!
